Cast Your Bread Upon the Waters

     The wishlist of a mother and her two children was adopted by the women's group from the angel tree one Christmas at the church where I was a member when we lived in Bartlesville. We diligently got all the items on the list buying and wrapping them ourselves or chipping in money for the bigger items such as a bicycle for one of the kids.

     When we were all done, there were $50 leftover, and one of the women suggested we give the cash to the mom rather than shopping for more gifts to total exactly $50. Everyone agreed that was a good idea.

     But then one of the women asked if we could tell the mom what she could get with the money – say, groceries, or clothing, so as to imply she shouldn't use it for alcohol.

My eyes got big as I looked at all the others. This was my usual state no matter what church I went to – I was always observing (and never contributing)– hoping to learn from their example as I figured they were all better people than I was.

     In this instance I was not disappointed. Another woman said that the $50 should have no strings attached, and we would proceed with faith that the mom would use the gift in the spirit with which the gift was given. The mom might take us for chumps and drink the cash away or otherwise spend it in what may look like a frivolous way, or she might look at that money and reflect on the generosity of the church to have provided a Christmas that she and her children otherwise might not have had and then spend the money with a full heart.

     Living by that example since then, I try to use gifts in the spirit with which they were given to me, and I let go of gifts as soon as I give them to others without trying to control how they will be received.

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